The Only Thing We Have to Fear

President Roosevelt said in his first inauguration speech that "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself." It is a very famous one-liner that we hear often. It is often said in regards to tyring something new or unknown to us. For some reason, this statement has been in my head for the last several weeks, and I  had a hard time figuring out why. It seemingly came from nowhere. Then, I remembered I had just finished reading a book by Dr. Claire Weekes. She was a rather famous psychologist that was well-known for dealing with people who suffered from anxiety and panic attacks. The basic premise of her work was that anxiety and panic come from fear. Eliminate your fearful perception of things, and you can eliminate the terrible symptoms of anxiety and panic that can you leave debilitated for months or even years. She talks about a "second fear". The second fear is the fear that is caused by the feelings of being afraid. It sounds a little odd, but it really is true. I have tried some of her ideas on myself, and sure enough, I have discovered that one of my big problems is fear.
Fear can bring us to our knees. It creeps in during silent times when we should be able to relax. It brings with it a racing heart, a pounding head, a feeling of dizziness, unsureness and/or unexplained muscle pain. Not to mention what it does to our minds! The more we dwell on fear, the greater the fears become. They grow and multiply. They morph into monstrous entities that run all over us... IF we let them.
For me, I was never really afraid of much...until the last few years. Suddenly, I became afraid of everything! Of course, if I look at the last three years of my life, it has been abundant with change. Big change. A divorce (finally) finalized. A new beau turned husband. Three moves. Yes, three. The loss of a pregnancy at 17 weeks. A 16 yr old son with a driver's license. Not to mention what all of those things really encompass.
Sometimes, I think we are really hard on ourselves. We think, "I can handle it. I need to be tough." Then, when for whatever reason we can't handle it, we beat ourselves up. Severely! When my ex-husband and I were first "exchanging" my daughter for the weekends, I was a nervous wreck. I was terrified of something happen to her since I wouldn't be with her. I was scared to death of my ex because he had made some extremely violent shows of his temper during our separation and divorce. Deep inside, I was afraid he might kill me. He had threatened to come to my job and start trouble. It was so embarrassing to have to let the school's security officer and the principal know what was going on, but they had to know. Just in case. I don't think I registered my reaction to this fear though until much later on when the fear had actually passed. I had spent months a complete nervous wreck pretending that I wasn't because I had even noticed I was a nervous wreck. It was just the beginning. It was the first fear, and many followed. Fear of losing my new husband. Fear of my children getting hurt. Fear of dying. Fear of losing my mind. Fear of disappointing anyone-I mean anyone. Then came the fears of something being wrong with our baby, and then there was something wrong. Very wrong. Afterward, there was the fear of not being "ok". There were doctors appointments and waiting. My nervous system was completely fried. I couldn't stand noise or bright light or talking to people for very long. Well, hello! I am a 7th grade teacher! I am surrounding by loud and bright all day! Fears had literally left me with terrible physical symptoms to deal with (like I had to wear earplugs in my classroom for a while to muffle any noise). I really thought I was losing my mind, so I took great comfort in reading Dr. Weekes' book which explained my physical symptoms and gave me some strategies to combat those anxious feelings.
I also took comfort in God. "Come unto me and I will give you rest," took on a whole new meaning for me. Praying became more than just talking to God. It has become more like a picture of a child that crawls onto a parent's lap seeking comfort and encouragement, and I find it speaking to God, reading His word, and meditating on the meaning. Dr. Weekes says in one of her books regarding those who can rely on God to help them with their fears, "So to tell people to put their faith in God and let Him cure them works only for those who have such faith and know how to apply it. These are indeed blessed!"(from Hope and Help for Your Nerves). Yes, faith again. It takes faith to do almost anything. It takes faith to reach out of the quagmire of fear and despair and sorrow and hold on to God and believe He will pull you out! Your faith may come naturally, or you may struggle to sustain the smallest amount, but it will grow during your desperation when you seek out the Father through your prayer and through reading the scriptures.